I'm So Over IT!
Do you ever feel like packing up your stuff, jumping in your car, and starting a whole new life somewhere else? Do you ever feel like life and circumstances are just getting old—and you’re so over it!?
Even if you’re not honest with me, I know you have felt this way at some point in your life. Some of you are frustrated and you feel like you’re constantly going in circles. You smile, but inside you feel overwhelmed and unproductive. You’ve tried to find peace in various things but it’s only temporary…then you feel yourself slipping back into that deep hole of feeling defeated. You’re exhausted, you want change, you want more—but every time you take two steps forward, you also feel like you get knocked 4 steps back.
You’re tired of hearing that a change is coming—with no visible signs of change. You want to believe...you want to be hopeful, but sometimes it just feels like real change, real friendships, real career moves, real community change, real support, etc., just isn’t a realistic, obtainable goal. And, if you’re wondering, wow…how did she just read my mind?
Well, it’s simple…I’m human just like you and many, if not all of us have been there. I can recall just feeling so OVER everything…job, relationships, school, trying to help folks, and just simply being done with it all. I wanted to pack up, and just go where no one knew me and start an entire new life with my family and the people who truly love and support me. Yep, this was me! Ha! I was ready to tell people and all of their foolishness where to go!
In her book, “Switch On Your Brain,” Dr. Caroline Leaf writes, “ When you make a conscious decision to focus and direct your attention correctly, you change physical matter—your brain and your body change in a healthy way. Purposefully catching your thoughts can control the brain’s sensory processing, the brain’s rewiring, the neurotransmitters, the genetic expression, and cellular activity in a positive or negative direction. You choose. (Leaf, Dr. Caroline. Switch On Your Brain: The Key to Peak Happiness, Thinking, and Health (p. 73). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.)
She also further explains that we cannot control the world around us, nor can we control the behavior of others. But, the one thing that we do have full control of is how we choose to think and process information (which ultimately influences our decisions and future). Life will always happen. People will always have an opinion; but our happiness is our own responsibility. Thus, packing up and giving up is never the solution. In fact, no matter where we go…without any doubt, we will run into similar issues, as we live in a flawed/wounded world.
So, what’s the solution to our distresses? How can we navigate through life and protect our peace and happiness? This was certainly a question I had for many, many years. I asked God, I prayed, I read books and I spent hours, days, and years trying to release the pressure that I would feel on a daily basis. But it’s so interesting because the answer was always right within me. My peace of mind and my happiness was my responsibility. Per scripture, “whatever you continue to think within your heart, you become.” Proverbs 23:7
I could not change the past, but I certainly had full control (with God’s help and guidance) over my future. Once I discovered this life changing reality, I no longer placed my peace of mind, destiny, etc., in the hands of other flawed humans—and I also began to see my journey as an amazing story being written and authored by God (and, Ohhh did he BLOW my mind in an awesome way).
God was, and still is the source of my happiness. I have my “days” and life still happens to me. Ha! However, I am very intentional about guarding who and what I allow into my physical and mental space. I desire quality…not quantity. And it’s amazing, because when your focus change, the increase becomes an automatic blessing from God.
In conclusion: my encouragement to you is to be intentional about your thought life. Whatever occupies your mind has the power to alter and shape your future. And, when you feel like you’re at the end of the rope…take some time to rest, heal, take care of you, and ALWAYS remember to connect with positive, like-minded people (those who both encourage and push you to be the very BEST version of YOU)!
Don’t QUIT! This is training! You can’t stop now! Keep hoping! Keep believing! God will not leave you hanging! It’s BIGGER than YOU!
Canena Adams, LLBSW, MA, SRAS
Wife | Mother | Writer | Author | Public Speaker | Social Worker | Business Owner | Nonprofit Founder & Director | Sexual Risk Avoidance Specialist | Healthy Family & Relationship Advocate | Adjunct College Prof. | PhD Student (Public & Social Policies)