What Are You Saying?

What Are You Saying?
Words are powerful. Sometimes, I really don’t think that we fully understand the power that we possess when we open our mouths. Have you ever noticed that when you focus and think about something for a long period of time, your mood shifts, your attitude changes, and ultimately, you start to speak and live that thing out loud!
As a woman of faith, I truly believe that, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue…” Think about that for a moment. Your words have the ability to change and shape your life for the overall good…or for the absolute worst. Granted, just being “positive” and speaking life is not the cure-all. Meaning, there’s no magic formula for an overnight success just by simply speaking positively.
First, you must totally “believe” what you are saying! Faith without works is dead. In essence, you can say, “money is coming” all day long, but you must also put in the work—and have a business plan, have your affairs in order, and be a man and/or woman of integrity, always striving to do your absolute best, be it via continual learning, having the right relationships, etc.!
Another scripture that I would like to highlight is: “…for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh.” In short, your mouth and/or your speech reveals what is rooted and/or imbedded within your heart. For example, I often hear people say things like, “I didn’t mean to say that…,” and in my mind, I’m thinking, “Yes, you did…” You see, it’s not that they “didn’t mean to say it,” they just didn’t mean to say it out loud.
All of us are guilty of it. I have said things that have revealed my heart, be it from wrong teaching, misunderstanding, misguidance, etc. And other times, it was really how I felt—and therefore, I owned those thoughts and views, as they were/are how I perceive the world and/or a particular topic or stance that I have.
Words have the ability to drastically change your life. And they also reveal the secrets of the heart and what’s valuable to an individual.
Another example: I once worked with a lady who constantly spoke of how awesome she was. And let’s be clear…I am ALL for self-worth, seeing the value within yourself, and the like. However, when a person is overly self-motivated, and do not “genuinely” care for and/or are not truly concerned about others—in all areas of life—and their ultimate goal is to simply benefit themself—I take note. If making money is only about how they can personally advance themself, it is very clear that they are self-driven. It’s kind of like the selfish opportunist who appears to be with you—but their ultimate goal is to leech, then jump on the next bandwagon that they feel will further propel them into their self-driven endeavors.
So, what am I saying? Well, it’s simple…your words (coupled with action) are a clear indication of what’s happening in your heart. If you find that you are extremely negative, or overly self-consumed, it might be time to do a “heart-check.” Having a healthy balance and clear understanding of why you believe and think the way in which you do are the first steps, as there is always a “WHY.” When you know why…it will be much easier to recalibrate and re-align your thoughts.
If your drive comes from a place of rejection and/or to prove a point, I hate to tell you…it’s unhealthy and could be very toxic for you and those you are connected to. In my book, “I Know Why I Got Married: Breaking the Cycle of Family Dysfunction” I share that my “WHY” was rooted in breaking the negative cycles; but that was not always the case. Meaning, there were moments in my life when my “WHY” was rooted in proving a point and deeply seated in childhood trauma and rejection. But over time, God completely healed those wounded places, and my drive and “go-getter” attitude was re-birthed, from a healthy place.
Moral of the story…ask yourself: “What Are You Saying?” What are your words/actions saying about you?
Love Y'all!

Canena Adams, LLBSW, MA, SRAS
Wife | Mother | Writer | Author | Public Speaker | Social Worker | Business Owner | Nonprofit Founder & Director | Sexual Risk Avoidance Specialist | Healthy Family & Relationship Advocate | Adjunct College Prof.